Wednesday, July 09, 2008

Food for Thought

NOW in your local parish supermarket. Free prize inside, limited time only: Special Secret Decoder to translate polysyllabic words, sophisticated phrases and eloquent language into banal, pedestrian and simplistic verbiage for your local liturgist or liberal neighbor. With five boxtops, you can also order a companion decoder to decipher ICEL double-speak (new and improved edition from Vox Clara).

Larry Liturgy (pseudonym) admits Papa Ben's Novus Ordo 2.0 might just kill any hopes of future liturgical abuse, innovations and shenanigans by the left-wing elite experts (all who mysteriously have monosyllabic names, like Gabe, Tad, Ralph et al., and are conspicuously and frequently mentioned in the National Catholic Reporter).

Call to Action
and Voice of the Faithful are seeking to create their own brand of spiritual food to compete with Papa Ben's. Problem is they only use outdated and expired materials from the 1960's and have an aversion to using recipes (which they consider to be dogmatic and doctrinaire). Hence, their alternative product is a 45 year old formula which is so amorphous and draconian (going back to the old days of Baal worship) that it has a limited shelf life. Consumers today are health conscious and avoid the sugar-coated, saccharin sweet nonsense of the Kumbaya days when theological dissenters and politico-social hippies were almost indistinguishable, in thought and dress. Today's mainline Catholics want QUALITY and GOOD TASTE, which are found in the non-generic name brand product put out by Holy Mother Church for two millennia, known as the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass (now in two flavors, Extraordinary Form and Ordinary Form). What attracts people to this high caliber product is its perennial truth, its perpetual source of divine grace and its pronounced reverence, all missing in the cheap, inferior quality from the abusers and innovators who seek to 'DO LITURGY' rather than to 'OFFER SACRIFICE & WORSHIP' to the One True God.

Silver Jubilee

His Excellency, the Most Rev. Kevin C. Rhoades, celebrates his 25th anniversary of ordination to the priesthood today. The former rector of Mount Saint Mary's Seminary, Emmitsburg, MD, is the ninth bishop of Harrisburg, Pennsylvania.

ad multos annos

We are blessed to have our current bishop since he is completely orthodox (ran one of the best seminaries on the East Coast) and is a loyal son of the Church. Bishop Rhoades restored the Tabernacle in the Cathedral to the center of the sanctuary and he invited the Fraternity of Saint Peter to come and celebrate the Extraordinary Form of the Roman Rite on a weekly basis (formerly, only allowed once a month on a Saturday evening) in a gorgeous German church, one block from the Cathedral. Our number of seminarians have doubled since his appointment as our chief shepherd.

Tuesday, July 08, 2008

Liturgical Nazis Prepare For Conflict

Black-shirts and storm-troopers parade in full battle gear as Catholic faithful become restless with the latest rejection by the USCCB of proposed translations of the 2000 Latin Typical Edition of the Roman Missal. Correct and accurate are not diametrically opposed to edifying, reverent and eloquent. Unfortunately, the lower clergy and the laity suffer with the sometimes droll, often inaccurate and usually pedestrian ICEL English translations from the 1970 Paul VI Missal. Meanwhile, the latest John Paul II edition remains in the Latin and unused in most of the USA. Despite Bishop Serratelli's erudite article, 2/3rd's of his brother bishops in the United States did not approve the recent proposed translation. Evidently, too many polysyllabic, urbane and debonair words for the allegedly unsophisticated, mundane, and prosaic faithful who supposedly need banal, pedestrian and trite translations instead. Maybe we need Liturgical Sesame Street to help people learn about the ineffable and sublime sacred mysteries of authentic divine worship; or so we are led to believe by the 'experts.'

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